Monthly Mulling💡

When More is Actually Less: The Paradox of Choice

Hi👋 Tapan here.

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Happy Sunday y’all!

📖 Currently, I am reading: The Difficult of Being Good: On the Subtle Art of Dharma by Gurucharan Das

After devouring Gurucharan Das's first book, "India Unbound" which tackled 'artha' or material well-being, I couldn't resist his sequel. This time, he dives into 'dharma' asking the crucial question: "Why be good?". Das uses the Mahabharata as a lens to explore the complexities of dharma.

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🍝 The Florence Conundrum: A Tale of Too Many Choices

Last month, I was soaking up a killer sunset at Florence's Piazzale Michelangelo. A couple of beers in and with the sun taking its final bow, I felt hungry.

The Golden Hour in Florence: Where the Paradox of Choice Begins

As I descended the hill, I was greeted by a smorgasbord of dining options—pizza, pasta, falafel, burgers, and yes, even gelatos (no judgment, a gelato dinner is completely fine!😂).

Armed with Google Maps, I started my quest for the "perfect" meal. "Hmm, this place is rated 4.3/5, but there's a 4.6 nearby". I walked past several inviting restaurants, only to find that the 4.6 was fully booked. "No worries, there's a 4.5 close by", I thought. But alas, it was also booked solid.

After an hour of aimless wandering, I finally settled for a restaurant with a decent rating. As I savoured my pizza, my mind was elsewhere: "If only I had booked that 4.6", "I should've planned better", and "The vibe next door is better".

The Pizza Paradox?: Good, But Not 'The Best

I had a sense of regret (🫣).

This isn't the first time I've felt this way. Every choice I make, no matter how small, feels like it comes with an opportunity cost. It's like I'm always missing out on something better.

I wish I could just pick a restaurant that looks good and enjoy my meal. But I can't. I always think there's a perfect meal out there for me, and I find myself scrolling through reviews to find it.

That’s the thing about the Internet: It doesn’t simply help us find the best thing out there; it has helped to produce the idea that there is a best thing and, if we search hard enough, we can find it. And in turn there are a whole bunch of inferior things that we’d be foolish to choose. 

- Aziz Ansari, Modern Romance

🧠 Unpacking the Paradox: The Psychology of Choice

This psychological quagmire is known as the Paradox of Choice. Contrary to popular belief, having a plethora of options doesn't make us happier or more satisfied. In fact, it often does the opposite.

Where the Paradox of Choice melts happiness.

The term was coined by psychologist Barry Schwartz, who wrote a book and a paper amusingly titled, "Doing Better but Feeling Worse". It's like he peeked into my life and wrote a research paper about it!

Schwartz's book was based on groundbreaking research involving a simple experiment with jam. On one day, shoppers were presented with 24 types of jam; on another, just six. Guess which display sold more?

Too many choices? (image source)

Learning to choose is hard. Learning to choose well is harder. And learning to choose well in a world of unlimited possibilities is harder still, perhaps too hard.

- Barry Schwartz, The Paradox of Choice

📉 The Downside of Abundance: Why More Choices Aren't Better

So why does having more choices make us miserable? Here's the breakdown:

📈 Escalation of Expectations: With more options, we naturally expect to find the "perfect" one. Anything less feels like a letdown, even if it's objectively good.

😰 Opportunity Cost: Every choice has an opportunity cost. The more options we have, the more we feel like we're missing out on something potentially better (the “FOMO factor”).

😭 Regret and Anticipated Regret: The fear of making the "wrong" choice can be paralyzing. Sometimes, even the anticipation of regret can stop us in our tracks.

This leads to a trifecta of mental overload:

🤹‍♂️ Choice Juggling: With so many options, picking one becomes a mental circus act. The fear of making a bad call can be overwhelming.

🔋 Brain Drain: Our mental bandwidth has its limits. Think of your brain like a smartphone. Too many apps (choices) open, and it starts to lag.

😴 Decision Burnout: Ever notice how making choices get tougher as the day goes on? That's your brain getting tired, making each new decision feel like a mountain to climb.

🛒 Life's Little Traps: The Paradox of Choice in Everyday Scenarios

👩‍❤️‍👩 Swipe Right, Swipe Left: The endless swiping on dating apps leaves us perpetually wondering, "Is there someone better out there?" It's a never-ending cycle of FOMO and dissatisfaction.

Aziz Ansari in Modern Romance asks, "With all these options, how's our decision-making?" According to Schwartz, we're not just looking for "good enough"; we're hunting for "the one."

So, how many profiles do you need to swipe through to know you've found the best? The answer? You'd have to see them all. Otherwise, how would you know?

It's a one-way ticket to misery (💀).

I've chatted with friends who are on these apps. Most feel like their dates are always ready to bolt—probably because they're wondering if someone better is just a swipe away.

🥣 The Cereal Conundrum: Ever found yourself paralyzed in the supermarket aisle, staring at 50 different types of cereal? That's cognitive load and decision fatigue messing with you.

Supermarkets are overwhelming, sometimes. (source)

👗 The Fashion Fiasco: The endless options in fast fashion and online stores make choosing an outfit mentally exhausting.

📺 Streaming Struggles: Remember when TV was simpler? Fewer channels, set showtimes, and somehow, we were okay with it. Now, we're scrolling through Netflix, Prime, HBO, and more, stuck in a loop of too many choices.

As the number of choices grows further, the negatives escalate until we become overloaded. At this point, choice no longer liberates but debilitates.

— Barry Schwartz

🎯 What's Your Choice Style: Maximizer or Satisficer?

There are two types of decision-makers in the context of the Paradox of Choice:

🏆 Maximizers: The folks who won't settle for anything less than the best.

👌 Satisficers: The people who are cool with "good enough."

The maximizer is kicking himself because he can’t examine every option and at some point had to just pick something... Maximizers make good decisions and end up feeling bad about them. Satisficers make good decisions and end up feeling good.

— Barry Schwartz

Both approaches have their pitfalls:

Maximizers might miss out on simple joys while hunting for the best.

Satisficers could lose out on achieving more by settling too soon.

Psst, you can find if you’re a maximizer or satisficer using this quiz. 🤫

😃 The Happiness Scale: What Choices Really Cost Us

The Paradox of Choice doesn't just complicate decision-making; it impacts our overall well-being. The constant chase for the "best" becomes a never-ending cycle, leaving us perpetually unsatisfied.

Choice Overload: When More Options Lead to Less Happiness.

We're constantly bombarded with images of people living their 'best lives' on social media leading us to question our own choices and happiness. When we travel, we create a list (at least I do) of these places that we should visit to feel similar happiness.

We are in an endless pursuit of more. Riding the wrath of the Hedonic Treadmill (🎢).

Humans can simulate future situations in their heads to predict what it’ll be like to experience them, but that simulator doesn’t always work so well and tends “to make you believe that different outcomes are more different than in fact they really are.

- Tim Urban

📝 The Choice Handbook: Practical Tips for Navigating the Paradox

🔒 Stick to What You Know: Limit your options by going with trusted brands or your go-to favourites. This helps you dodge decision fatigue.

Steve Jobs and Mark Zuckerberg famously wore the same clothes daily to save mental capacity for making more significant decisions at work.

👍 Good is Good Enough: Not every choice has to be a home run. Sometimes, a base hit is all you need.

⚖️ Find Your Balance: If you're a Maximizer, try to ease up on less important decisions. If you're a Satisficer, push yourself a bit more on high-stakes choices.

🧘‍♀️ Be Present: Before you make any decision, ask yourself, "Will this even matter in 5 years?" Set your own bar for what's "enough."

Remember, happiness is the difference between what you have, and your definition of enough.

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